You know the saying in dating that advises, “Once you stop looking for a great guy, he’ll land in your lap”? Well, the same may be true for finding your true love career. Sure, preparation is important. Knowing yourself and thinking specifically about what you’re going after are key steps that will help you increase your chances of making a great career match. But I would be misleading you if I didn’t admit that there’s also some timing and serendipity involved.
Do you look desperate? You know how when you WANT to meet someone, you can’t seem to get a second glance, but then as soon as you’re off the market, you suddenly appear to be the most desirable woman in the world? That same cosmic mess-with-your-head principle may apply to career dating as well. Somehow, employers and contacts sense the beseeching plea that seems to emanate from your every pore (and you thought it was just the Love’s Baby Soft you’ve worn since you were 12). No matter how calm and composed you think you’re being, if your body language is saying, “HELP me…I hate my job and I want one like yours”, you may find yourself having great meetings with people that never seem to go to a second date. Your desperation is making them feel trapped, nervous and possibly even that you have ulterior motives.
Whether it’s tantric hot yoga or retail therapy that calms you down, find a way to tap into your inner Zen…or you will end up alone with your internet favourites permanently stuck on monster.com. And I wouldn’t wish that on you. You seem like such a lovely woman.
Christine Fader is a career counsellor and author of "Career Cupid: Your Guide to Landing and Loving Your Dream Job". Visit her at www.careercupid.com
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